From nicotine-stained Betting Slips to Boardrooms

Awareness DaysPersonal Stories
Written By Sonia Mangan

Dementia Trust Adviser and Nurse Sonia Mangan.

As we celebrate International Women’s Day 2025, themed “Accelerate Action,” I reflect not just on my professional journey and work in supporting people with dementia and their carers but on the personal experiences that shaped my path. My story—like so many women’s stories—is one of adaptation, resilience, patience and, above all, care.

Growing up, care was never framed as a choice; it was simply what women did. Whether it was looking after my younger brother, being with my Mum as she supported elderly relatives and pals, or stepping in when someone was struggling, being a carer was woven into the fabric of my life before I even recognised it as unpaid labour.

Even when my career took me into unexpected places—a very smoky, loud and male dominated betting shop, hospital wards, care homes, and many charity boardrooms —the underlying thread was always the same: I was a carer first.

Care as a Constant

Like many women, I learned early on that care work is expected, not acknowledged. It is something you fit around everything else, even when it takes a toll. And that toll is real.

  • In England, from 2020 to 2022, women as young as 15 could expect to spend 7.6 years of their remaining life providing unpaid care, compared to just 5.3 years for men.

  • By the time women reach 50, they are expected to spend 4.7 years caring for others— staggeringly 13.7% of their remaining life expectancy—while men will spend only 3.5 years (11.4%).

  • The impact of being an unpaid carer is profound: in 2021, one in four unpaid carers reported being in “not good health”, compared to fewer than one in five adults who were not providing care.

  • Nearly half (48.6%) of unpaid carers experience at least one adverse health effect from their role. This is worse for women (53%) compared to men (42.7%).

  • Low mental well-being is more common among unpaid carers (19.5%) than those not providing care (14.8%).

  • Female carers are more likely to require emergency hospital visits (A&E), especially when providing increased hours of care.[i]

  • More than half (57%) of carers responding to the Carers UK State of Caring survey said they feel overwhelmed ‘often’ or ‘always’. Over a third (35%) said they have ‘bad’ or ‘very bad’ mental health, compared to 27% in the previous year’s survey[ii]

These numbers are staggering, but they are not surprising. Women are expected to juggle being a carer with everything else, often at the cost of their own health, financial security, and personal ambitions. 

Care is More Than a Role—It’s an Identity

For me, caregiving didn’t start when I became a nurse or a charity leader—it started long before that, in ways I didn’t even recognise at the time.

“I also saw what happens when the system fails carers—when the financial, emotional, and physical burdens pile up without support. When women leave the workforce because flexible working isn’t an option. When their mental health declines but there’s no time to focus on it.”
— Sonia Mangan

I remember watching my mum care for relatives, often putting her own needs last. I remember the exhaustion on the faces of women around me, balancing work, children, and aging parents with no complaint because that’s just “what we do.”

And later, when I found myself in carer roles—whether at a patient’s bedside, supporting colleagues, or leading a charity—I saw those same patterns playing out. Women caring, sacrificing, making it work. Often unseen, often undervalued.

I also saw what happens when the system fails carers—when the financial, emotional, and physical burdens pile up without support. When women leave the workforce because flexible working isn’t an option. When their mental health declines but there’s no time to focus on it. When care responsibilities aren’t recognised as labour—despite being the foundation of our families, our communities, and our economy. Carers support has been costed at a figure of £189bn per annum,[iii] that level of contribution comes at a cost to individuals.

Accelerating Action: We Must Do Better

If caring is a women’s issue, then the fight for gender equality must include care work.

We need to stop treating unpaid care as an invisible burden and start recognising it as essential work that deserves:

  • Proper financial and policy support—including carer’s allowances, paid family leave, and pension protections.

  • Workplace policies that accommodate caring responsibilities—so women don’t have to choose between their careers and their loved ones.

  • Better mental health support for carers, acknowledging the emotional toll of their role.

  • More men actively taking on caregiving roles, challenging outdated gender norms.

If we truly want to Accelerate Action, we must stop accepting caregiving as a personal sacrifice that women are expected to make and start building structures that support and value it. 

A Personal Commitment to Change

I never set out to be an advocate for unpaid carers. But my experiences—both personal and professional, especially those supporting people with dementia—have made it impossible to ignore the systemic inequalities that keep women in these cycles of unpaid labour.

I have seen the exhaustion, the sacrifices, the love, the resilience. I have felt the weight of expectation, the frustration of being overlooked, the guilt of wanting something more.

That is why, wherever my journey takes me next, I remain committed to:

  1. Advocating for carers’ rights and recognition

  2. Pushing for policy change that supports unpaid carers

  3. Using technology and AI to ease the burden of care, rather than replace the human connection that makes it meaningful

Advocating for carers’ rights and recognition

Pushing for policy change that supports unpaid carers

Using technology and AI to ease the burden of care, rather than replace the human connection that makes it meaningful

Caring isn’t just a personal issue—it’s a societal one. And if we want true gender equality, we must recognise, respect, and support the invisible labour that underpins our world.

Final Thoughts: A Call to Action

As we mark International Women’s Day 2025, let’s go beyond just celebrating women’s resilience—let’s commit to real change.

  • If you’re an employer, consider how your workplace can better support carers.

  • If you’re a policymaker, push for real, structural change to support unpaid caregivers.

  • If you’re someone providing care, know that your work is valuable, your well-being matters, and you are not alone.

Find support from your local Carers Centre or Charity Carers Trust | Transforming the lives of carers or Alzheimer's Society.

Look out for one of the The Dementia Trust | Making Change Happen for nearly 40 years projects from Together in dementia everyday. When no one else was here for me, tide were beside me, Dementia Carers Count: The Caring Experts or Rare Dementia Support

The fight for gender equality is not just about boardrooms, pay gaps, or representation—it’s about care, the most fundamental and undervalued labour of all.

This International Women’s Day, let’s Accelerate Action and ensure that the women who hold up society are finally seen, heard, and supported.

Sonia Mangan
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